Still no meds! :-( Just got the bloodwork faxed yesterday. I originally faxed it last Thursday, but evidently they didn't get it. Since I was over at Mom's all weekend, and un-medicated, I didn't call-in Friday to check on the status. I should've. And even better, the doctor is out of the office until Monday the 20th. So, my labs are now playing fax/phone tag. I'm hoping for this week before I completely drop the English language and start to communicate solely in the form of sleepy grunts and yelling.

Our new CC company for accepting cards for business has already annoyed me, too. It's not them, but a 3rd party they use to perform site surveys. We processed a card straight-away when we started with them, then underwriting decided they wanted a site survey. Guess we should hide the pot plants, eh?! *eg* Anyway, point is, they got all sorts of confused because we have a mailing addy and our actual business location is our home. It never got done, but we had no idea the whole thing was still in limbo until we just processed a card and yeah - where's our money?! Oh, well your account is on hold, pending a site survey... *sigh* Trying to get that resolved TODAY. Nothing like having $800 tied-up in electronic land! At least we did another big job yesterday so we can send some $$ to living expenses. Seriously, we were at $0 business funds all weekend, and we have basically gone through the personal savings. I'm resorting to beans and rice, folks. Which may have the added benefit of being healthy and stuff, but I don't know how to cook that way, yet!

I'm supposed to be looking for a part-time job, too. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I hope DH understands the futile nature of that request ATM. Until I do get back my meds, it's a hopeless cause, IMO. I did see where some nice British Pub was hiring for hours that would have been great, but I'm 1/2 asleep 24/7, need to be at Mom's weekends currently and the pub is about 30 mins away. So, sounds great, but the logistics sucked. I'm hoping for something more local. Maybe I need to put myself out there on LinkedIn. There's got to be someone looking for part-time help and having trouble finding or keeping it. Though I do like my waitressing and I really want to get out of the house!

So, yeah, things are a bit nuts over here. But seriously - when are they ever calm?! I want to know. I should look back, because I sure don't remember those times. I need me a pint of John & Rodney right about now. I got some nummy JF goodness on a repeat of CSI while at mom's last, but that's it. Couldn't stay awake until 1am to see Atlantis re-runs on SyFy. And I will never get used to typing that.

If I am subjected to the same "Bob the Builder: The Live Show" episode one more time.... *headdesk*

So I completely missed the trash last week - I forgot at night, hubby can't grasp the idea - they came at 6:30am. So, last night I made darn sure I put the trash out! And... it's still sitting there.

So, here I am last night at about 10pm, standing in front of my sink - blowdrying a small (fuzzy) mouse because I defrosted it for my snake to eat but of course they get wet. So, I blowdryed it to make it more appealing. Seriously. The things we do for pets.

So, let me back-up because i don't think I ever mentioned getting a snake! We were in Petco about 2-3 weeks ago and saw they had ball pythons on sale for $30. From a petstore, that's cheap! So, we decided spur-of-the-moment to get one. We had a 55-gal aquarium so that expense wasn't necessary. That made it actually 'cheap' overall to get the snake. (unlike when you buy say $3 worth of fresh-water fish and then spend $50 or more on a tank, gravel, filter, etc) After a week, DH had the snake on his neck and didn't feel it slither off! Duh. So, he was lost and I'd just dropped $40 on one of those under-tank heaters. (not realizing I could have spend 1/2 that on Amazon! Stupid me) I wasn't very well going to let the tank go to waste (you can't remove those intact once they're on) so we got another snake since they were still on sale. Then, about 3 days later - of course we found the first one! Originally I was calling them 'Thing 1 and Thing 2' but amusing as that was I ended-up with Ra and Anubis. The Stargate references were too good to pass up. One has a 'dot' near his/her head(Anubis), so that is how I tell them apart. We could have returned one, but I figured what was the point? It's not like it's overly-expensive to feed them and I don't have to buy them monthly flea treatments like my cats!

Just in case you are wondering, yes I held the dead mouse in my bare hands, and no, the snake did not eat! Ugh. I think we definately need to seperate their living quarters. If nothing else, it will help us keep track of who eats what! I've fed 2 this weekend, and even though we usually seperate them out, my DH left one in the cage w/ both snakes Sunday. So I have no idea if one of them has eaten two, or if they've both eaten.

In other news, I've started a blog. I don't consider this a blog since I post stuff here that wouldn't be fit for public consumption. ;-) You can find it at http://www.wahconfidential.blogspot.com If it gets popular or something, I might move to my own URL, but for now it's good. And if you want to check out a hysterical and sarcastic blog about "There are two types of people in this world" go to http://www.tattopitw.com - the posts are short-and sweet but really funny if you're a sarcastic bitch like me. :-)

So here's the deal - we started the new company. That was a given, but it is also now a good time to re-think things and start some projects that never got off the ground earlier. So, I would like your opinion as consumers in general -

Are you sick of getting 'newsletters' by email? - Yes/No
What about snail-mail newsletters/papers? - Yes/No
(My thought process here would just be that it's more unique at this point)

I'm trying to determine if it's even worth it for me to try to get a newsletter together and send it out monthly. Our customer database program will automatically send to groups I've put together, so I don't have to use something like Constant Contact. BUT - I'm thinking it's possible people are just 'over' that. I know I am - there are very few things that come into my inbox (either of them) that I actually read. I've un-subbed to several things after not reading the prior 6-7. In my case priorities change and such, but it's not just that.

So, feel free to give me your thoughts. I also realize many of our customers aren't on email daily, either. So when they do check their mail I can just imagine how much stuff is in there!

In case you are wondering, I was considering setting-up a monthly get-together at our home or perhaps the local wine shop. (my house isn't quite ready but close) That way it's more interractive and we could spend more time talking w/ our customers rather than just typing at them. :-)

Ana and I had an awesome visit to her endocrinologist today. The last time she hadn't been in a year, and the very thought of stepping on the scale sent her into a tantrum. This time we talked about what would happen, and even though originally she said she didn't want to go she behaved well and did everything w/o complaint. I think her sugar was normal, too, which helped. Last time she was high.

But of course, all good things... we're driving back on the interstate and even though there was a happy LED road sign 5 miles ahead of the crash, specifically saying the left lane was blocked.. oh yeah. You know the story. Put. Put. Put. Ugh. People drive me bats. I swear, I was thinking wouldn't it be great if we had cars that could drive themselves?! That way when they received some electronic notice like that, they could take control from their human driver (idiot) and merge waaay before the orange cones force them. They could also not slow down and rubberneck, but still stay at a safe speed while there are emergency vehicles about. Of course, having something like that might negate the whole accident-thing all-together. But I'd be happy to just have electronic common sense.

Oi vey. So here I am, swimming in the world we all call reality. Some days it's great, others I think I'd rather just be drifting-through in need of meds. The worst part is realizing stupid crap is still going to happen and having to spend months on clean-up. Of course, having to deal with agencies that don't cooperate isn't helpful. (Government, anyone?! Argh)

Other than Ana entering a stage where I swear I'm not sure she's going to survive (whining, talking-back, overall obstinance) we've been starting-up the new company. It's 'new' in the legal sense, but of course most everything else will be the same. What I am trying to not have be the same is ignoring of basic book keeping functions. So I got some blanket agreements off the computer today (yay Google) and put together an Operating Agreement and a consent form of actions taken to start the business. It's so, so easy to just take the whole LLC status for granted, but the last thing we need is for someone to come along and say we deserve to be treated like a sole prop because we've acted like one. Personally, I like my reduced liability, thank-you-very-much.

Went without this weekend, and frankly last week I had my 'friend' and even with meds until Thursday life sucked. So hopefully this week will see more production.

Had the first ADD Social Club meeting and 1 person showed! Of course, the library wasn't available and all sorts of issues, so yay on one person! I have 1 RSVP so far for this Thursday since the 3rd Thursday I could consistently get a meeting room. Hopefully if this doesn't grab more than 1 person (not the same one, since he's on vacation now) next month will be better and more organized.

Fun? Oh yeah, I knew there was something my life lacked...

Call me. Once again modern technology has sent me into a tailspin and I gained all the phone #'s from Scott's phone, unfortunately that didn't include yours.

So, I am once again w/o any way to contact you other than this. Or perhaps pigeon.

Love, your daughter.

http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/beauty/yay-french-elles-amazing-no-makeup-issue-and-why-american-mags-need-to-step-it-up-446538/

So French Elle has an issue out with models 'sans fard' ie. no makeup. You can click on the link to see example covers.
So what do you think? I read a couple pages of comments and they seemed to be either the typical 'ew, ick, put it on!', to 'no, no they are gorgeous real women' to 'sans my butt, they do too have makeup on!'

I think they look great, personally. Even if they did put on some concealer and foundation, it's loads better than the Las Vegas showgirl look most magazine covers have.

Still taking my generic Adderall. Doing pretty well, actually. Sure, life is not perfect. It really sucked that the first couple days I felt awesome were a false-high you get when starting. :-) But, I can concentrate better and I actually get more stuff done.

Having said that, now my challenge like never before is to work on those things that no medication can possibly cure. I'm mad-crazy with the hyperfocusing. Unfortunately in my world, this leads to un-finished projects and neglected areas that have been cleaned-up to become messy, again. So, I am really trying to focus on not losing sight of things all-together, even if I have to back-off because of priorities.

My seedlings are still not planted in the hydroponic unit, mostly because it's not built. I have way more than it can handle, though and I did purchase the necessary supplies to pot some of them, instead. I have kept them watered and they still live, except for a few. I can totally be happy with that, even though some days I wish I was further-along. This weekend I plan to pot them, since last weekend I got the supplies and took some much-needed 'me' and family time.

Yay - my florida room the seedlings are in has not been messed-up again. :-) I've also finally gotten all the paperwork off my dining room table this week. My office is messy again, but that's ok. It's ok because there is no paperwork *anywhere* else! Hip-hip. I even cleared-out the couple bins that were lying around in the spare bedroom. I'm thinking about cleaning that up this weekend. In reality it won't take long at all. I can see a lot of it is simply SCA clothes and supplies that need to be put away. I have the closet for that, and some of them are already hanging-up. The rest have been deposited there from cleaning other rooms. I just never went back and re-organized the room. It will go a long way to making my journey more bearable if I can walk down the hallway to my office and not see the giant mess greeting me! Sadly the way things are layed-out right now I can't close the door at all.

The sink had a bad couple days, but we're back in business. I boiled some chicken quarters I bought for 79cents/lb. and left them in the pot for a day because I was sick. Luckily they were fine, and I managed to make chicken salad out of them for lunches. The grease plus some meat in the drain stank-up the kitchen, but that got cleaned-up when I got home from my meeting this AM. I walked in the house and went 'OMG! No, cleanup on isle 1 right now!'

I've been wanting to get something going consistently regarding upkeep of the house and business. This time I might actually make it, gosh darnit. :-)

The last piece of business to update on is that I have formed my own Adult ADD support group. Yep. Well, the short of it is I went looking at the national organizations, and the one that has a group active here, that group only deals with kids. Go figure. We get no respect! So, I searched Meetup.com, which I already participate in a group from. I found one in Orlando, but Altamonte had a waiting list of 37 people! So I decided to create my own. I'm having the typical bugs, like getting folks to join! :-) So far it's just me. Anyone want to join?! LOL Anyway, I am sure it will take a bit. Luckily they sent me a coupon for 50% the startup cost. So it was pretty cheap for 6 mo. ($36) I automatically get more than 1, as well. Maybe I can get my feet wet with another topic and slowly grow the other. We'll see. I needed something for myself, though! Yikes, I have absolutely no friggin' life!

Had to go to the doc last Friday because I was out of refills for both my meds. The thyroid I need to get lab work for, but I didn't renew the Welbutrin. I told him the truth - I'm not 'depressed', anymore. I'm just frustrated that my ADD symptoms keep my from getting anything fucking *done*!!
So, he gave me Adderall. Man, I am in love. I've gotten so much done around here since then it's rediculous. Keeping up with the stuff, too, which is the important part. Before I would blitz-clean, then crash, then my house would go back to being a black hole of doom. I'd be up this late typing about how much life sucked or how stupid someone was - blah blah. Not to say I'm somehow cured of humanity ( I got aggravated earlier today because I couldn't find my SS card) but it's much nicer to come into my office and have a clear idea of what to do and how, versus coming in here and staring morosely at the computer and wishing I could go to bed. :-)

So, we'll see if I become some crazed speed-freak or something. I'm going to try and take at least Sunday's off, and most days I only take 1 pill, versus 2. (I'm on regular, not the extended) Today I took two, and Saturday. But I'm also trying to get as much of this junk cleaned-up as possible so I can work on maintenance and having some semblance of a life. You know - that thing that happens seperate of the papers in your office and the guilt in your head?!

First, I have a whole bunch of sprouts now! It's great. Gotta get on with building the hydroponic unit, probably this weekend. Not sure exactly when I should re-plant as it were, but I think it will be fairly soon.

Now for this: http://www.slate.com/id/2214498?wpisrc=newsletter

I don't really know how I feel about this in total, yet. On the one hand, you have couples who are unable to have a child naturally, so they get someone else to carry the fetus. It's an accepted practice and seems harmless enough - until you start factoring in all this other 'stuff'.
Are you paying someone who genuinely cares about you and your future baby or are they in it for the money?
Are they desperate? Not only for money, but potentially for the child you are asking them to carry? I think these women are screened, but still.

In a perfect world, these women would continue to carry the fetuses and they would join their families and all would be right in the world. BUT - this is where it gets sticky for me. Because, IMO, part of doing this is an extremely selfish act on the part of the parents. One could certainly argue that pregnancy in general is selfish. We want to survive as a species, after all. BUT, instead of shouldering the responsibility themselves (such as taking-in the surrogate instead of sending checks to a company) they have made their reproduction a business, rather than a personal function. It ceases to be strictly about their happiness and their future offspring because they are no longer the only ones involved. Others take over, who will never be a surrogate, whether from lack of want or lack of equipment. It's not about an individual's life anymore. It's about how many couples they can 'help' and make $$ doing it. I seriously doubt anyone sat around in a room before starting this great concept and said - 'hey, if we start this and go broke we'll essentially be baby-killers'. Nope.
So, if you are asking yourselves right now, as I was, 'should these women get abortions if they aren't getting paid for having the kids?' you inevitably end up with a conclusion that doesn't sit well. Especially if you are pro-choice like me, the obvious answer has to be 'yes'. Not because they entered into a contract that wasn't fulfilled and it happened to involve being pregnant. Sure, that's part of it, but I would *hope* most of these women can see beyond that part. The real questions that may necessitiate that most permanent of steps are much stickier.
Will the surrogate be able to provide for the pregnancy now that $$ isn't coming in? If it's not technically her baby, I don't think she can apply for state funding.
Will the parents be able to afford to take the child if the pregnancy is carried to term? Some have lost considerable amounts of money, and will no doubt be funneling more into fighting a lawsuit. Then look at the dismal state of the economy - I can't help but wonder if a few of these families are now not as wealthy as when they started the process.

Abortion, at it's core, has never been about 'baby killing' no matter how many religious zealots you line up to say otherwise. It is in place to consider the 'best' interests of the mother, and perhaps even more importantly, the child. Whereas I would certainly hope these women don't go getting abortions just to terminate a 'work contract' I would also hope that they weigh their situation carefully, in addition to the situation they will place the child into. They are the ones who are charged with making the decision about the future life they carry - and no amount of money can ever compensate for that.

Joy is seeing seedlings. :-) At least for me because usually I can't grow anything. Not to say I'll have a bumper-crop but at least they are germinating so that's a step in the right direction.

To mom - you'll get your card super-early. You can determine if you open it or not, but if I don't send it now, I'll end-up sending it after my birthday, if ever. :-)

Still no cable, not even stealing. We're doing well. Ana watches some PBS during the day, and we rent movies, rip them onto our A/V computer, then send them back. When we want to watch something, we have it hooked-up to display on our big tv so it's the same. No streaming Netflix over our computers! Well, technically we are, but watching it on a really BIG monitor. ;-) I kinda-sorta miss American Idol, but not so much that I must be home at 8 or 9pm to watch it. Maybe when some more of the people get kicked-off.

Spoke w/ the home counselor yesterday. It was good - pretty much re-assured us we are doing the right things now which is always nice to hear. We have to send some paperwork to our mortgage company and see if we can qualify for help under the new stimulus. We have a Fannie Mae mortgage, so we do qualify that way. I thought so, but it's been so long. If they would do the re-fi down to what the home is worth that would be awesome. I'd be happy to scrape-up the $1,100 or $1,200 a month if it didn't go to just interest! Hopefully, though, we can lower that payment, too, if even just a bit.
Until we know for sure, I'm going to do what Flylady always suggests and 'move'. Meaning clean the house and pretend we are moving and toss what we wouldn't want to have to take with us. It will not only give me good incentive to get the paperwork cleaned-up and some other stuff, but if we do have to move, I'll be ready! And that will be so peaceful.

Well, we have an appt. later today with a legitimate housing counselor, found through the government website. At first sign-up they said it could be 15-30 days and they weren't off! They definately aren't the government, though, because they actually called me back and scheduled an appointment! Amazing. :-) So hopefully we'll get somewhere that involves staying in our house.

Planted some seeds and so far I have 3 sprouts. I did some googling after-the-fact and it seems I'm probably not keeping the tomatoes and peppers moist/hot enough. So I'll try to cut the cucumber part off (I went for the recycling/cheap route and used egg cartons) and put the others in a plastic bag. We'll see if that works. I'm excited though - at least something sprouted! And I got the cheap greenhouse thing I probably should have gotten in the first place to plant a couple more seeds in case the others don't sprout.

Started an experiment today I have thought-of in the past. Get up every day about 5-5:30am so I can have time to work by myself before everyone gets up. Working late after they go to bed works too, but since I have to take care of Ana during the day, I couldn't get enough sleep that way. I'm just much more of a morning person. Although it's still dark out, so I can kid myself I'm a night-person, right?! ;-)

OMG, all these people answering stuff that is less than 20 years old make me want to squash them! LOL
Of course I fell in love with Star Wars when I saw it on TV as an ABC Monday Night at the Movies. Yeah - waaaay back when they use to still do that! LOL But, even before I was introduced to that, I loved Sci-fi and "The Cat from Outer Space". Don't know if I'd love it now since I don't even know if I could get a hold of it. But probably that was my first intro to science fiction and look where it landed me! ;-)

Since being broke and about to file bankruptcy, quite a lot of change has come through my life of late. I've been without cable TV now for a week and really, we aren't missing anything. We still somehow get PBS, NBC, FOX and a couple local stations on our TV so we aren't entirely cut-off. And hey - DVD's! We joined Netflix because we definately will use it, and DH's bought the right to watch all the ESPN stuff he loves, over the internet, for $35 a year. Considering that's less than 1 month of cable was costing, it's a deal! Even with having the $14.99 netflix and $14.99 for Warhammer hubby got back on, we're still saving at least $30. And even better - we're not slaves to the tube.
I don't know what the heck took me so long, but I went to a local farmer's market this past Sunday and I plan to go again. The weather was terrible last weekend (cold, rainy and windy as hell) so many of the vendors didn't stay. But, the rain wasn't really a factor so I at least got to pickup some veggies, home made banana nut bread and talk with a guy extensively about his home made honey. He raises his own bees and everything. I'm hoping hubby can come with me this Sunday. There was a tent w/ home made sauces, but I wouldn't presume to know which one hubby would like since I'm not really a hot sauce kinda gal, anymore.
Recently a recipie was posted on a blog I visit daily (www.thesimpledollar.com) and after an error in making beans from scratch (after they cooked I left them out too long and they soured) I finally got some breakfast burritos. Mmmm. Tasty and cheap! I love it. I'm little-Miss-Chef now, it's great. I've always liked to cook, but I've been married to the boxes for so long. Beef Stroganoff? There's a hamburger helper for that! Tacos? There's Old El Paso box kits! LOL It's crazy how much we rely on pre-packaged food. That's why I chose to make the black beans myself from the dried beans. Cheaper and healthier since they weren't sitting around in a can for who knows how long. If mine went back at room temperature, then I *know* those cans must have something in them!
Haven't planted my seeds yet for they hydroponic unit, but I think I'll go ahead and bite the bullet this weekend. True, I have no idea if we'll stay here or move, but they are attached to each other and a rubbermaid tote. So, pretty portable I imagine. And light - except for the water, it's all plastic.

Oh, I agree with the majority - cell phones. And those who said bluetooth headsets are definately right, also. Ugh. Nothing is worse than thinking someone is talking to you only to feel like an idiot when they turn their head and you see that telltale growth in their ear!
I admit I have certainly gotten into the checkout lane of my grocery store with a cellphone attached to my ear. But I hate that, and I usually try to exit the conversation as quickly as possible.
And I currently don't have a headset, though I will say it is useful for me because I keep forgetting to bring my phone into the room with me.

The guy came to take my box and shut off our cable, today. And what sucked is SciFi channel picked TODAY to run all-day SG-1! Ack. I got to see about 2 epies this AM, but had to go help hubby at work. So instead of my last day of cable being enjoyable, I was working. Oh well.
Think I'm going back to Circuit City tonight and see what they've got left for SG DVD's. I feel gipped, now. ;-)

Our neighbors are moving this weekend. My daughter will be so devastated! They have a little boy, who's 4. So they liked playing together. Hopefully they'll at least get to say bye.

Well, I'll be spending this weekend figuring out how to re-adjust since we don't have a TV. I'm also running to Blockbuster tonight to get some DVD's of shows my daughter likes. I'm just not confident in my 3-year-old's ability to go cold-turkey!

Zafra Davian was the name of my first AD&D character. Even though I'm creative, I'm also lazy so the name has stuck with me. I even have a personalized license plate "Zafra".

Wow, you guys are getting a 'Law & Order' across the pond?! "Law & Order:UK" Sweet! I'm addicted to every incarnation of the show we have here. Hopefully at some point I'll be able to do a comparison. :-) But since I just called to cancel my cable today (cuts off Fri AM) even if they did add TV1 Wales to my lineup, I couldn't watch it! But that's ok - because we've determined:
A) We spend too much time sitting in front of the tube watching reruns mindlessly (Like, L&O, one of my fave time-wasters!)
B) We can get pretty much anything we want to see online fairly quickly, or rent/buy series on DVD. And of course movies are better w/o commericials anyway so nothing changes, there.

If we find we have the dire urge to do something that costs $$ and wastes time, we can always pick Warhammer Online back up. That's $30/mo for the two of us, which is half, at least, what the cable portion of my bill was. And you don't have to worry about missing something (generally) by not logging-on at a certain time, etc. Unless you do instances and raids with a guild. But, that's optional. Versus TV shows which are on when *they* say so.

Haven't purchased any Stargate DVD's yet. Probably will, but it's not like I'm rolling in dough, folks! Wish I had a couple hundred to blow and I could get the whole 10 Stargates and the 5 Atlantis seasons! At $20/each that would be (opens windows calculator..)$300. Well, a bit more than I'd want to spend, but not bad considering at regular retail it would cost around $500-600!! Yikes.

Gotta go. Been slacking in exercising, which low-and-behold, seems to affect my brain. So last week and this week has sucked, production-wise. Time to shake-it-off and step-up!